RADHIKA PALIWAL

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A Lesson From My 11 Year Old Brother

In the upcoming two months, I have to make a very important decision: where I want to move and which team I want to join. People who aren't in my position say this is an awesome opportunity to do what I want. I totally understand their perspective - however it's not all rainbows and unicorns. There are several factors that I need to consider: the location, the team culture, the department, the manager, friends/family in the area, as well as growth opportunities. Many times opportunities have risen in places with great teams and lot's of chances to grow but in cities that aren't my number one choice. Sometimes there has been an opportunity in the location I want but then the team isn't a great fit. The difficult part is deciding whether to go through with these half interesting opportunities or declining them as they aren't a 100% match.

Today, I learned a lot from my 11 year old brother. He's in fifth grade and as part of moving onto sixth grade, their entire class is required to put on a play for parents and faculty. To figure out who will take on what responsibility for the play, they were told to fill out a sign up sheet that included their name and a list of the available roles. They could pick as many or as little options they were interested in. My brother wanted to be the backstage director. So he filled out this form checking ONLY the backstage director box and leaving the rest empty. He could've chosen multiple boxes such as lead actor or costume designer or anything else (in case he didn't get the one he wanted). But he had his mind set on being the backstage director. My mom was very confused. She asked him why he didn't pick anything else and what if he didn't get the role he deeply wanted. He replied back saying "so what?"

As we grow up, we are taught to play it safe. If someone is handing you an opportunity, take it, even if you don't want it. We are told to minimize risk as much as possible. But that only limits ourselves.

When I called him today, he explained further. He told me that if he didn't get this role, they would probably assign him something else like a tree because all students are required to participate in the play anyway. He wouldn't regret it because he had tried for his perfect position and if they didn't see him fit for that, then "so what?"

It was all or nothing. The backstage director or a tree. It made me realize that if I were to pursue these half interesting opportunities, I would be "settling" for something that isn't a 100% fit for me and I wouldn't be happy. If given a list of all the jobs I could apply for, I want to be able to select one and ONLY one. The ideal one. Luckily my brother got the position and is now directing all backstage activities!! The lesson here is that it's okay to be picky. It's fine to know what you want and pursue it. Don't conform to society and let them talk you into things you don't really want. Never thought a 11-year old would teach me this.