Stop Following Your “Passion”: Be Good At Something (Anything) Instead
Passion [ pash-uhn ] noun. any powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, as love or hate
I’ve been wanting to write this article for such a long time but the words have never come to me in a way that would make sense to someone else. However, last night, my dad, mom, brother, and I were in the living room talking about certain Harvard online courses my 13yr old brother could look into while in middle school. He goes “but none of them are interesting! they sound so boring” And like typical Asian parents my mom and dad started yelling at him to just do engineering or finance or law or medical. My brother became quiet and that was my cue to chime in. Before I share my thoughts, let me share my mom’s view “kids are naïve; they don’t know anything, that’s why parents pick a major for them and tell them what to do”. The way she and many other people in Asian countries are raised is by listening to what elders say. They believe that kids don’t have the knowledge or intuition to know what to follow. My sister is a great example of a Gen Z kid who will rebuttle everything my parents believe in. She stands up for what she believes (sees on social media) and wants to follow her passion of being a Youtuber. That was in 2014. Her ‘passion’ over the years has changed to becoming a Tiktoker. In the meantime, she’s done nothing to follow through with that interest.
I disagree with both of them. Strongly. Here’s what I told my brother. Passion is great but it’s rare. Most of us in the world don’t have a passion because quite honestly we don’t know enough about ourselves and the various opportunities that surround us. This leads many people into an analysis paralysis mode. How can I simply pick ONE passion that I need to follow for the rest of my LIFE. What an intimidating thought! I can’t even commit to one outfit for the night, picking a passion that defines my life?
I told him that instead of picking a passion, pick something (anything) you’re interested in and be disciplined about following through with it. Take the next 4-5 years of your life and dedicate it to that one thing. Not forever, definitely not your entire life, there are no commitments except for focusing on this one thing for a few years. Do you know what will happen?
You will get good at it.
The better you get at it, the more you learn, the more you like it, and… you start feeling passionate for it. WOAH, what?!
That’s right, where does passion blossom from? It’s a powerful or compelling feeling towards something. Typically when we feel that strong sense, it’s because we are good at it. Think about any activity you’ve ever enjoyed, it’s probably because you know you can achieve it. And why are you good at it? Probably because you’ve taken the time to learn and practice the skill. For example: I love drawing, because I know I can draw amazing portraits, which is because I spent YEARS in my childhood taking classes and perfecting my skill. In fact, I took classes up until high school. In those years, I truly believed my passion was drawing. If you had seen my drawings in the beginning, you would want to rip them apart and throw it away. Hell that’s what I wanted to do. I hated making mistakes and hated it when my portraits didn’t end up looking like the person I was drawing. Over time, I became better at it. As I perfected my skill, I enjoyed the process even more. I developed a passion for art.
Then life shifted and I learned this isn’t what I wanted to follow and I took an interest in coding and pursued my interest in Computer Engineering. I hated it at first, it was so hard, nothing made sense, and through classes, homework, labs, I got better. I knew I was getting better as I started scoring internships and completing projects in half the time allocated. I ended up really enjoying my major and don’t have any regrets about it!
Then it was time to get a job, I knew I wanted to be customer facing because as fun as coding was, I couldn’t see myself sit behind a computer 8 hours a day. And this shift led me to being a Sales Engineer. For the past 3 years, that’s been my focus. Learning, bettering myself, having mentors to learn from. In 3 years, I was able to receive 4 promotions because I became so good at my role. A role I had no idea existed in high school or college! A role that I wasn’t passionate about as a 15 year old but ended up learning and getting better over time!
Now, I’m focused on real estate. For the next few years, that’s my focus. If you want to call it passion, go for it. But let me just share that I didn’t wake up everyday as a 5 year old dreaming to be a real estate investor. I barely knew what that meant.
If I haven’t said it enough, stop looking for your passion. Stop spending time finding your one true love. Find something, literally ANYTHING you’re even mildly interested in and go follow it for the next few years. That’s all.